childhood – Page 2 – An Unorthodox Halloween

And, the finalists are…

Those of you who were with us through the Christmas conversion last year, know that the Christmas Kitchen Calamity is soon on it’s way. Last year, in place of some of the cookies, we tried our hand at some candies for the first time with some English toffee and peanut brittle. With some mixed results.

But, it was a lot of fun, and I’ve decided I want to try a couple new recipe’s from the treasure trove again this year. The finalists up for consideration are:

English Toffee: Yes, I tried it last year. I never got it RIGHT, though, and there’s 3 OTHER recipes for it as well. One markedly different…

Ginger Bread: Come on, nothing says the holidays like ginger bread, right?

Taffy: I have a homemade taffy recipe here! Oh, how I love Taffy…But, I’m tempted to just buy me some Softi Kaubonbons instead.

Fudge: Memories of making fudge a few times as a child. I have easily a half-dozen recipes in the trove. Or, I could ask mom for hers…

Spudnuts: HOMEMADE SPUDNUTS!!!! I drool just thinking about it.

“Vanilla Pretzels”: This thing reads a lot like German Stollen recipes. mmmmm….stollen….

“Soft Cookies”: Odd recipe from Evelyn…whose recipes I’ve come to love. Sour cream, and NO instructions…can I revive this recipe?

And, on the not so sweet side:

“Best Hamburgers in the World”: A singularly peculiar hamburger recipe that has change my mind on how to make burgers, and I haven’t even attempted it yet. Is this the year to put it all together?

“Sausage Creole”: I’m a sucker for Creole cooking, plain and simple. A joy to find this thing.

Fears of Childhood 2.

Way back in July of ’08 I did a little post on the fears of childhood.

And, with Talia having some restless nights again, I figured it was time for a little update.

Talia’s latest fear come as a surprise. This, her having seen me making Bobs and Dragons in the garage, taking her on dark rides hundreds, if not thousands of times over the summer, exposing her to haunted houses…ADULT haunted houses for the first time…I fully expected to go into her room on hearing her whimpering hearing how she was seeing evil clowns, undead, or other forms of monsters. Instead, I got “Tigers scary”.

From An UnOrthOdOx Halloween

Well, yes…Talia, Tigers ARE scary. “Tigers in the corner”

“You see Tigers in the corner?”

She looks around. “No, that’s silly, night-night”

Where this is coming from, I really don’t know. She LOVES to see the tigers on the train at Lagoon. She has “fluffy” a little tiger animal that she loves. But, at least she rationalizes once she wakes up.

Alec….

Want to see Alec curl into a ball screaming, rendered completely helpless with fear?

From An UnOrthOdOx Halloween

He first encountered the ‘chainsaw guy’ at Haunted Hollow last year. He screamed and curled into a shuttering ball when they came right at him, WAITING IN LINE for the place.

To his credit, he bounced right back up. He still gives the (rather nice) chainsaw maniacs at Lagoon a wide berth when possible.

I ran from my fair share of chainsaws back in the day.

Kyle, on the other hand….

Ever since watching I am Legend, Kyle has had this thing for Zombies.

From An UnOrthOdOx Halloween

Even the guys he KNOWS are costumed, he does not really like to be around tooo much.

I can’t blame him much. There was nothing on Halloween night that would scare me more than whoever it was that dressed up…well, to be honest, I never got a good look at him. Just HEARD him shuffling after us.

As for me…

About the time I was 8, there was a rash of news, both television and print, of local sightings along the Weber River of Bigfoot.

From An UnOrthOdOx Halloween

Oh, how I soaked all those in. Dreamed of seeing Bigfoot along the river banks so close to our house. Dreamed he would come walking out of the corn whilst working down on the farm in the wee hours of the morning. Or, that he would come hiking out of the brush whilst camping.

Shadows, movement, all were Bigfoot. I checked out books on the subject, watched all the tv specials I could…

We even, for a fleeting moment caught a glimpse of Bigfoot one early morning in Yellowstone. A dark shape, arms swinging back and forth as it walked away from us up that hill…Ok, so it was a buffalo, it’s winter coat not fully off, swaying as it walked, but for a moment there, I had seen Bigfoot.

Careful what you wish for.

You know the tales.

You get 3 wishes. Each goes horribly wrong…

These tales were some of my favorites as a youth. From the Arabic tales of the Djinn (Genie) leaving poor souls in desparate situations (Disney’s Aladdin has been pacified as all other Disney films), on through more traditional tales of magic fish or other beings known to grant wishes.

Last night was a real treat. The Chiller Network was doing their tribute to St Patty’s day. Now, the guide on the Direct TV said I was tuning in to see an episode of the scariest places on earth. I was surprised to find a fascinating treat from my childhood.

The Leprechaun Artist. I recalled this episode fondly. And got a good chuckle as it proceeded along it’s predictable path.

I though I would take the opportunity to share a personal favorite of mine among these wish-granter tales.

The Monkey’s Paw.

I recall reading this in school, and being fascinated by it. I find today’s childrens tales of things like Goosebumps and similar style to be quite silly, and far less terrifying than these old school notions of keeping the horror in the reader’s imagination. Seldom do we see new fare that lives up to the old classics.

It was even a feature of that scary radio show my older brother and I would stay awake to listen to. One of the few episodes that made a lasting impression.

And, for a real treat, here is a reading of the Monkey’s Paw, along with some other greats, by John Lithgow.

It was a rare treat to stumble across that at work late one Sunday evening (years ago, back on the weekend shift)

Zuvembie!!!

What is a Zuvembie, you ask?

I’ll get to that a bit later…

Voodoo Moon.

This made for TV movie has been airing on both the Chiller Network and SciFi constantly lately.

You know it was bound to be horrible. But, I’ve made a point of sitting back and watching anything remotely voodoo oriented, because you never know when a crappy movie might have something we can incorporate.

This film does have some nice cemetery shots all over. But, otherwise becomes that flashy “voodoo” one comes to expect from a hollywood film. Well, it really depicts a hollywoodized form of Santeria more than voudoun, but, the layman wouldn’t know the difference.

The sole saving grace in the film comes by the fact it’s one of the few, especially in modern times, that portrays Zuvembie.

What is a Zuvembie?

Well, now, that is a tale…

As a child, one of our favorite activities was visiting the comic book store. My older brother was an avid collector, and he hit all the big titles of the day. X-Men, Wolverine, Spider-Man. Etc.

Typically, the store only had one copy of a particular issue, so it was counter-productive for me to try and get any of those. So, I initially would read GI Joe, and various oddball miniseries. Well, GI Joe got REALLY WIERD about 20 issues in, and I started looking at other things.

With my older brother reading all the big names, and my younger one picking up the “b list” of Daredevil and Ghost Rider, I was wondering in some of the oldies when I stumbled on Moon Knight. Specifically, Issue 29.

From An UnOrthOdOx Halloween

It was, simply, the most intriguing cover I had ever seen. And, it featured a hero fighting off a werewolf!

THIS was the kind of thing I LOVED at the time. So, many more Moon Knight comics were sought out. And, many times, he would be fighting off horror-inspired foes. Including Voudoun.

From An UnOrthOdOx Halloween

Well, being smarter than the typical hollywood fare, Marvel knew enough to know that true zombies are not the mindless living dead made by some silly virus or radiation that all hollywood movies tend to portray, but rather the dead being brought back to life by a Bokor.

However, Marvel had a slight problem. The word “zombie” was forbidden from use in Comics by the Comics Code Authority. Quite frankly, the whole TOPIC was technically forbidden. Along with werewolfs, ghouls, cannibalism, vampires, and torture.

And, as Moon Knight tread on that edge, flapping in the face of the CCA, probing it, pushing it’s limits, and sometimes even outright BREAKING it. (you’ll notice issue 29 does not carry the CCA seal of approval, because it has a werewolf!)

A relative unknown, able to get away with such things so Marvel knew how far they could push their A-list heroes, the word “Zombie” still drew the axe down.

Thus, they created Zuvembie: Differentiated from the typical zombie by the fact Zuvembie are under the control of a Bokor.

It’s all Mom’s fault.

I was asked again, recently.

“How is it you see things so DIFFERENTLY?”

Some people look at things and see what is there. Me? Typically, I see whatever it is that I want.

For those of you that may not know, my mom is an author. I still recall those days long ago. The Apple IIe sitting in my parent’s basement, the computer desk a great castle for my GI Joes. While my mom sit down and write. (or at least try to, what with us kids…) Back then, that’s what I thought writing was. It took many years for me to fully understand the gravity of what it was to be an author.

Once a quarter, my mom let us have a free day. A day off from school to do with as we pleased. Provided our grades held. Looking back, I recall fondly my days were often spent stopping at Burger King and heading to the county library with mom. Learning to use the microfilm/fiche machines, mom would be looking up god only knows what. I was typically looking up Bigfoot sightings in the papers, or books on how to build castles. The Library was a magical place, only rivaled by our trips to the comic book shop.

This thrill of discovery, of research has never left. Why are things so? What’s the reason behind them? A little known fact is that each year, with the yard, we’ve explored a different society, and their particular means of sacrifice.

As I grew older, I learned to people watch with her. Just go sit and watch folks in the mall. Each have their own story. Each their own motives. What are they, why are they there?

This passed on to walks, car trips, anything. Hey, what’s in that black bag on the side of the road? Maybe it’s a dead body dumped there by the mafia.

NOTHING is so fascinating as watching people FRIGHTENED, though…

This passed on to everything, including my daily chores. I wasn’t mashing cans to recycle. I was firing artillery at the army of zombies coming down the hill.

This kind of thing was often encouraged, even. And, whatever my interest as well.

Not many kids can claim to have (unintentionally) gotten high off rubber cement and moth balls with their mother as we spent hours putting some finishing touches on a bug collection.

It didn’t really strike me that this may not all be quite “normal” until I was 16. There’s something about walking through a prostitution museum with your mother, featuring profilactic methods of the 1800’s that does kind of hit you as maybe a bit odd, though.

So, why is it that I see things so differently?

I don’t see what’s THERE. I see what COULD be there, and must ask WHY and for what reason?

If it interests me enough, I’ll research the dickens out of it. And, if that bears out, I might just MAKE something to add to the yard as well.

And, it’s all Mom’s fault.

Thank god.